absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
