Midget sex pt 2 tonight
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
