you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
