there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
