There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I just sucked dick on a ferry
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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