I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
