i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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