no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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