I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
