Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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