her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
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