Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
