Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
That accounts for only three of the penises
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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