windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
