I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
3 2 1 whiskey
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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