oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
mondays should just be called national damage control day
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
