Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
