i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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