I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I came so hard my ears popped.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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