I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
