Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
