I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
