I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It's never too late to be topless.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize