Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
