Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize