Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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