ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
