well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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