I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
