So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
