I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
