Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Randomize
