discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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