Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
