sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
