just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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