He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Randomize
