I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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