please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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