How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
