Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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