Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
