..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize