so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
