so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
The adults are the big ones right?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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