I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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