Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
