i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
