lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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