Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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